Month: September, 2013

It Goes So Fast

When my children were small women in their fifties would see them and say, “Enjoy it. It goes so fast.” Then they would smile and sigh. Today I realize it was a sigh of longing. At the time I just didn’t understand. I was knee-deep in diapers and naptime, picture books and Raffi. (“Baby beluga in the deep blue sea..”) In my 25-year-old mind they would never grow up; there was no end in sight.

This afternoon I saw a baby being carried by her mother. She was so cute. I looked at her and smiled. Then, I sighed longingly.



Smells get to me. Sometimes they set off a yearning in me that I just don’t understand.

This minute it is a meal that I smell, coming from someone else’s apartment.  I cannot describe the smell, yet it makes me yearn for my youth, for a time when I didn’t have a worry. Not one.  No bills. No children. No “relationships.” Just me. An unknowing youngster, alone and happy. It makes me long for a time when I was truly free.

How can it be that the wafting smell of someone else’s dinner can bring so much emotion and memory?

For My Daughter ( You know who you are!)

Thank you for making me a mom. It’s the toughest job in the world—the job that never ends. Once you have a child you can never rest as easy again. But it is my favorite job, my favorite title, my favorite place in the world.

Thank you for keeping me honest. Sometimes I hate you for that, but I need it. Thank you for making me think in new ways and for getting me to dig deep.

You entered the world thirty years ago today. For that gift I am forever grateful. Knowing you makes my life richer indeed.Image